Some background

First of all the URL name, Hunterslumpycancer comes from the fatty tumors he has been plagued with his adult life.  When we started taking him to see Dr. Heather for acupuncture she made the comment that the more lumps the more to love.  So he has swollen lumpy lymph nodes to add to the fatty tumors....more lumps, more love.  And Lord knows we can't love that boy any more love.

This is my big man the day that I found him.  He was obviously sick and very young.  The day was October 27, 2000 and it felt like yesterday.  He ruled the house from the moment he steped foot in it.  Although he was sick and needed lots of care, he was smart and very funny.  We knew our lives were forever changed.  It didn't help that because of him we rescued several other dogs.  He changed our lives and I am not so sure he was always happy about all the brothers and sisters he had to share with.  No matter what, he knows he is number one son.

 Is he spoiled?  Oh hell yeah, but he is so well behaved it is almost like he tries to hide the fact that he isn't a human boy.  His brother Dexter, who passed away in May was very high strung and the complete opposite of Hunter, you could see Hunter rolling his eyes at him and just shacking his head. 

As you can tell from the picture on the top of the post, he grew up to be big and strong.  He was never a physically active dog; we took him to a fun run and he stopped half way through the run, bit his leash and sat down.  There was never a question what the dog was thinking.

So, September 17 I woke up and was getting ready for work.  Something wasn't right with Hunter.  I couldn't pin point it but I knew something was seriously wrong.  I tried to talk myself out of going to work but after being sick for 6 weeks and taking almost a month off work I couldn't really justify it.  I was so distracted I literally wrecked my car on the way to work, turned left in front of someone.  I haven't told Hunter this was because I was distracted but he is pretty all knowing. 

I took him to the vet on Friday and Dr. Reed, his regular vet on Friday September 20.  I had to carry him into the vet, so very much not like my big strong guy.  I was of course in hysterics.  Dr. Reed took one look at him and said he isn't the same boy she had seen a few weeks ago.  She felt around and said that she was 99.9% sure he has lymphoma.  I lost it. We started treating him with prednisone until we could decide what whe wanted to do.  We made the appointment with the oncologist, which you can read about in the last post. 

I am still not sure what I want to do.  I found Hunter October 27, which means he is really probably 13 years and 3 or 4 months.  I don't think age should be the only factor in making the decision to treat or not but I am not sure what those factors should be.  He is tired, I know that.  He is only eating canned dog food that I spoon feed him (and maybe the occasional corn dog from Sonic).  Is that my sign?  If we treat the rest of his life will be doctor's appointments.  Normally that would be an issue but Hunter loves everyone and swears no matter where we go, everyone is there to see him.  He loves to go.  But do we want to put him through the stress of loading him up once a week for blood work.  Do we want to just give him treatment on the chances that he may get an extra month?  Maybe we will get lucky and get a year? 

I am hoping by keeping this blog it will help me work through some of my feelings.  I also hope it may help me or someone in the future who may have to go through the same thing with a piece of their heart. 

I am still working on getting the blog set up, I am not very good at this.  I can't find my charging cord for my laptop at home so I am working on a bluetooth keyboard and my Kindle.  I will figure it out eventually.

Before I sign off, Hunter didn't have much of an apetite this morning.  He and I sat on the deck with a can of dog food.  Normally he scarfs it down but he only hate about a quarter of it this morning.  He shows no initiative at all to eat dry food or to eat the canned food if it is just sitting there.  Again, trying to figure out if he is just spoiled and liking the attention of if food just doesn't matter anymore.

I will post an update later.  Tomorrow is decision day on the chemo so I am sure I will be a hot mess.